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chosh part one

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back for a bit

19:38 on 01.25.03
"trigonometry"

tradition!

(listening to fiddler on the roof right now. well, just 'tradition' and i love this song. it's tres bien!)

so joshua came over today. we studied. and he really helped me out. in fact, i am very relieved and not worried about math. i finally understand trigonometry. i think i will do fine. in fact, i think i might get in the high 90s. i have never been this confident about a major exam before, so it's nice to be calm, especially because i thought i was going to fail the math thing.

so josh and i were talking in the car today and we decided that i may never be able to make the top ten at clix (link on the left, hint! hint!) because i am not a sexual minority, addicted (or once addicted) to drugs or alcohol, or promiscuous. but i am a madly in love aspiring musician who gains enemies for being good. does that count as an interesting read?

erg. then we were at kim's basketball game and joshua's mom called and was furious because we weren't studying and wanted joshua home immediately. so joshua and i got upset and into a fight. a major fight. we almost broke up. that was earth shattering, and very scary. terrfiying in fact. he asked for 'his' ring back. 'his' ring being the one year anniversary gift to me. and when he asks for that... *shudder* i must admit, i was completely frazzled for a bit there. we're madly in love and doing very well, so when when we fought, it was almost a wake-up call. kind of like, "wow, what's happening here? and are there any internal problems that we didn't know about or tried to ignore?" but apparantly, there was nothing wrong. just two upset teenagers which has always been a lethal thing (in my experience). in the car when we were bringing him back, the two of us were laughing and cuddling, just like normal. which was beautiful, because his head was against my shoulder and i got kisses and hugs. (o:

kate started an interview site! go get interviewed. i just answered the questions she sent me. (o:

i still miss ilana so much. it's hard being away from your best friend. because friends will stick closer than family. they're easy to talk to and so much fun to be with. but aggghhghgh!!!! i haven't spent any time with her and it is so frustrating *!*

cty memories are now coming back, as i am listening to "stairway to heaven" which is a major cty canon song (obviously... @ carlisle dances, it's the second-to-last song @ every dance.)

too long until cty. too long until summer. too long until my last two sessions. too too long. that is also frustrating. i think my love for cty has been expressed many times. and honestly, i wish that there was a regular school like cty. because cty is this unifying force between all different types of people. the prep and the punk get along fine at cty. it's like all stereotypes have been dropped. and i don't know if it is because of the fact that we're all smart and geeks at heart, but there's something about cty that lets everyone get along. everyone is respected, everything is respected. bonds are formed that could never be broken, many times between people who you would never see socializing outside of our little world. you just are who you are, and be what you can be. and that is whats so nice about it. the classes are only half the fun. the people make up the rest of the experience.

come to think of it, cty was originally created to allow socially crippled smart kids (aka geeks n nerds) to havea chance to make friends.

so i guess it all makes sense.

i love joshua. <3 chelsea